un peu, beaucoup, à la folie

Cliché Busters, a smart, fascinating blog written by a sociologist, takes on a topic that hits close to home, "The Cliché of Liking." Dr. Niedenthal approaches the idea of "liking" or "disliking" a country or region based on what parts of your personality that country allows to you express, and how, to what extent. 

It's a brilliant distinction between what most expats (myself included) tend to state about their reasons for emigrating, and the underlying psychological compulsions for such a major move. 

In Paris, many expats express their love for the City of Light's wealth of culture -- artistic, architectural, gastronomical, sartorial, etc. This is a nearly indisputable point, and certainly one of the reasons I chose to study and work there, and one of the reasons we will probably return. But beyond the aspect of liking museums, macarons, and Modernism, the emphasis placed on the necessity of culture and the heavy financial investment in its maintenance, could be interpreted as a reflection of the personalities of the people who live and pay taxes there. As an expat in Paris, you are included in this group of culture vultures, and I think many find this an affirming expression of a desire to engage in culture heavily.

"I think that what people end up liking about a country, then, is not individual aspects of it, but rather the extent to which they can be themselves or a different, “desired” self in that context." Yes. Certain places elicit distinct sides of our personalities. Just off the top of my head: Toulouse encourages me to smile less at strangers, maintain a polite distance or reserve in public settings, but also take a more relaxed (compared to Paris) approach to life in general. None of these behaviors would I consciously manifest! Smiling at strangers seems like the simplest act of kindness one can practice, informality to me is a sign of trust, or maybe just more fun, and if anything, I have to battle my tendency to toward "relaxedness."

Is it possible to dislike a place, but feel like that is where one's true desired self is expressed?